I'm driven by a fear of failure.
My default assumption of most unexpected negative things I experience is that I must have messed up. This became embedded through years of floundering in education and full-time employment. "We're concerned about..." and "I was hoping that..." are grim, familiar phrases from authority figures I was desperate to impress. My assumption's power is in its speed, taking root before logical analysis can happen.
However, there is a powerful antidote to this response! A gradual process of re-programming and rebuilding. It involves:
🧱 Feeling gratitude: I'm in a good place in my life overall.
🧱 Reminding myself that I'm recognised and rewarded due through my hard work.
🧱 Using affirmations. They sound silly when said out loud but *they work*.
🧱 Meditating: after ~ten minutes of silence, my busy brain settles down and decision-making becomes much easier.
These enable me to develop a process of analysis I can call on instantly. It gives a realistic, positive assessment with clear, simple action to take.
Now, I'm less driven by fear of failure and more by confidence in my abilities. Which is much, much better; it makes life an adventure.
Take that, inner fear!
What unhelpful beliefs do you have? How do you counter them?
[image by Jonatan Pie on unsplash.com (an excellent resource)]
